Artemis Fowl and the Arctic Incident (Artemis Fowl #2) by Eoin Colfer

Inside EXCLUSIVE files from the ARTEMIS FOWL archive!

From: Colfer, Eoin (pronounced 'Owen', by the way)
Sent: Yesterday
To: The World (above and below ground)
Subject: A message from Artemis Fowl's Official Biographer

The facts contained in this book are just that -- facts.

It's all true, every word. Irish criminal mastermind Artemis Fowl has discovered a fairy race living below ground. He has extorted from them and the fairy police have been on his tail for supplying power cells to the goblin gangs.

But that's not the half of it. The Russian Mafiya are holding his father to ransom in the Arctic Circle and only Artemis's bodyguard, Butler, stands between him and an evil pixie. As an explosive situation threatens the entire fairy civilisation, Artemis realises that even a wicked genius needs help sometimes. And it can come from the most unlikely quarters . . . 

Fowl will deny all of this, of course, as will his army of lawyers.
But they haven't sued me, have they?

Read on if you must. But wrap up warm. Things are about to get frosty . . .
  Eoin Colfer

Disclaimer: This man is NOT my biographer. He is a fantasist, writing sensationalist stories about me. I will neither confirm nor deny anything that appears between these covers. However, my lawyers -- and my bodyguard -- are watching.
Signed Artemis Fowl II